When Chickens Attack (a.k.a. Case #10801)
by Kyasarin
Summary: An idiotic fic of epic proportions! In chapter seven, there is a reappearance of the Author and Fairy-butt finds her companion! PG-13 for language and cause I feel like it. And if I get 4,673 good reviews, everyone gets a lifetime supply of spinach!
1. Aardvarks and Bush Babies

Hello, welcome to my silly Zelda fic, called WHEN CHICKENS ATTACK. I was inspired by the insane chickens in Kakariko Village that attack whenever you get the bad side of them. So, here it goes, right after the:  
  
Disclaimer: I is not owning anyone!!! Nobody is mine!!! No one doesn't not love me!!! WWWWAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
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Zelda: When Chickens Attack (a.k.a. Case #10801)  
  
Chapter One:  
  
It was a sunny day in Hyrule. Officer Policeman did not have much to do since Ganon was defeated. However, he didn't remember any of that, or at least he wasn't supposed to. All because of Zelda and her antics. Humph. You know, if it weren't for her-  
  
The Author cleared her throat. "AHEM!!! Quit whining, get to the story!!!" Okay, okay, geez...  
  
As I was saying, it was very rarely that anyone came into the police station (if you could call it that, it was just a desk, a phone, and a computer in the old pot room... er, I mean room full of pots). So, Officer Policeman was very surprised when a Kakarikan village-goer came panting into the pot room (excuse me, room full of pots).  
  
"Officer Policeman, Officer Policeman!!!!" he said. "Come quick! Someone's being attacked by chickens!!!"  
  
"Eh?" Officer Policeman said. "Chickens?"  
  
The boy nodded urgently. "Chickens."  
  
"Chickens?"  
  
"Chickens."  
  
"Chickens?"  
  
"Chickens."  
  
"Chickens?"  
  
"Chi -"  
  
Suddenly the Author burst into the pot room (I mean - ah, screw it.). "YES, CHICKENS, NOW SHUT THE HELL UP!!!" Then she slammed the door.  
  
"Alright, alright," said Officer Policeman. "Now, you're sure they're chickens?"  
  
The Author came in again. "YES!" she said.  
  
"Absolutely?"  
  
"YES, AND IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP, I'LL -" She lunged for Officer Policeman.  
  
"Okay," he said, dodging the Author, "I'm on it!" Then he ran out of the pot room.  
  
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Officer Policeman walked up the stairs to Kakariko Village. "Sonny, I don't know why they make these stairs so long, it's such hard work for an old man like me to-"  
  
"Um, sir?" said the boy. "You're only 25."  
  
"That's the spirit!" said the Officer. "Now, run along." The boy ran, or rather was pushed, to his house. "Now, for those pesky, er... what were they again?"  
  
The Author ran in. "Too... many... damn... stairs..." she panted. Then she looked up. "Oh!" She cleared her throat. "CHICKENS!!!!"  
  
"Ah, yes, I remember now! They were aardvarks!"  
  
The Author rolled her eyes. "You're pathetic. I'm outta here."  
  
"Now," said Officer Policeman, "off to find those pesky um... oh yeah!!! Bush babies!" And he rode off into the night. But not before running into the tree at the entrance of the village. 


	2. The Appearance of Waston

La la la!!! Welcome back!!! I knew you'd come. *smiles smugly* Why do I always write stupid intros on my stories? No one probably reads them anyway. Oh well. Any way, you know what time it is:  
  
Disclaimer: Officer Policeman is mine. The Stupid Fairy is mine. The Author is mine. Waston is mine. All the rest are copyright some date to Nintendo.  
  
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When Chickens Attack (a.k.a. Case #10801)  
  
Chapter Two:  
  
Officer Policeman was still on his quest to find the aardvarks... er, chickens, sorry Author.  
  
The Author smiled.  
  
Yes, well, anyway, Officer Policeman was still on his quest to find the CHICKENS that were doing something in Kakariko Village. Let's pick up where we left off, shall we?  
  
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"Hmm..." Officer Policeman said, scratching his chin. "What have we here?"  
  
He looked around. There was no sound, except for the exceptionally loud noise of chickens clucking and flapping in the background. "What do you deduce, Watson?" He looked around. "Watson? Where are you? You were here just a minute ago..."  
  
The Author suddenly materialized in front of the Officer. "No he wasn't," she said tauntingly.  
  
"Oh, yeah?" he retorted. "How do you know?"  
  
"Because I created you, dumbass. Now shut up and get on with it."  
  
"Okay, then, could you create me a Watson?"  
  
"Hmm... let me think about it," she said. Then she disappeared.  
  
Suddenly, a little child with brown hair and a long mustache ran up to Officer Policeman. He was wearing a neon orange shirt with puke-green colored suspenders. "Yo," he said in a gruff voice.  
  
"You!!! Little kid!!!" Officer Policeman exclaimed. "You must be my Watson! Author, thank you so much!!!"  
  
"Okay, let's get something straight," he said. "First of all, I'm not Watson. I'm Waston. And second, I'm thirty-three years old."  
  
"Brilliant deduction, Watson! I mean, Waston, sorry lad." Officer Policeman then ran over to the guard, who was guarding the gate to Death Mountain.  
  
"Excuse me, Mr. Guard, could you tell me where to find some chickens?" he asked.  
  
"Why, chickens!" he said sarcastically. "Why don't you try the Chicken Lady?"  
  
"Oh, thanks!" Officer Policeman turned around. Waston, huffing and puffing, had just reached the top of the stairs.  
  
"Alright, Waston, we're off to find the Chicken Lady!!!" said the officer, running off the ledge and on to a pot. "Ow..."  
  
"Brilliant," Waston said.  
  
"We must find a healing fairy, fast..." Officer Policeman said, gasping in pain. "I think I'm going to die... soon..."  
  
"Ah, quit yer whinin'," Waston said, after descending the steps as fast as he could (which was not very fast). Then he kicked the officer in the leg.  
  
A passing carpenter looked at them in pity. "There's a healing fountain in the graveyard," he said.  
  
"Okay, let's go there!" Officer Policeman said, leaping up like everything was perfectly normal again.  
  
Waston shook his head. "What is the world coming to...?" 


	3. It's Tea Time!

Whew! I've got a bad cough... I was coughing all day yesterday... And now my throat is sore... *sigh* As Liz says, "It's not easy being cheesy! Anyway, my bro got a Gamecube for Christmas. Those things are friggin' tiny!!! I could fit it in my dresser...! Not that I ever would... hee hee hee...  
  
Disclaimer: YOU ALREADY KNOW. Now let's get to -  
  
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When Chickens Attack (a.k.a. Case #10801)  
  
Chapter Three  
  
Kupo! Ahem... when we last left our heroes *coughyeahrightcough*, they were struggling over to the graveyard to get to the fairy fountain. Unfortunately, Officer Policeman is unbearably stupid and does not know how to do anything. Now, let's get to the story!  
  
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"Hmm..." Officer Policeman said. "I wonder where we could find a graveyard around here?"  
  
Waston yawned and stretched. "Woo!" he said. "I'm ti - HEY!!!" Officer Policeman had just picked him up by the collar. "What do you think you're doing?" he said indignantly, flailing and kicking the Officer. But Officer Policeman, being the doofus he is, didn't feel a thing.  
  
He went up to the Carpenter Boss by the tree. "Hey, dude, where's the graveyard?" he asked him.  
  
The Carpenter Boss looked at him strangely. "Hmm..." He wasn't sure what this strange pair was up to. He was sure, however, that it was probably nothing good.  
  
"Ah, yes, the graveyard," he said. He pointed forward. "Right that way, sir."  
  
"Okay, thanks!" Officer Policeman said. He ran in the direction that the Boss had pointed until Waston managed to give him a swift kick in the shin.  
  
"You idiot!" he said. "That's the way out!"  
  
"Oh..." said Officer Policeman. "I knew that!" Then he went to find another villager to ask.  
  
He ran up to a young woman by a chicken coop. "Excuse me, ma'am, do you know where the graveyard is?"  
  
"Oh, my chickens! Could you help me - oh. Yes, right that way," she said, nodding in an indistinct direction. "Now, come back here my chickens!"  
  
"Okay!" said the valiant young policeman. Then he set off running. Again.  
  
Waston kicked him in the shins again. "That was the Chicken Lady, you idiot!!!"  
  
Officer Policeman shrugged. "This is more important."  
  
"Well, then," Waston said shrewdly, "what exactly are we going to do there?"  
  
Officer Policeman looked a bit stricken for a moment. "Ah, well..." he stammered. Then a look of triumph came over him. "That is not important!" he said importantly. "Now, faithful sidekick, come! We're off to see the Wizard!"  
  
Suddenly, the nonexistent Kakarikan clock chimed twelve. "Oh, my goodness!" said Officer Policeman. "It's tea time." He then proceeded to pull a checkered picnic blanket, a picnic basket, and a silver tea set out of nowhere.  
  
"What about the fairy fountain?" Waston asked, now extremely annoyed.  
  
Officer Policeman shrugged. "This is more important," he said, pouring tea into his teacup and taking a sip. "Aaah - refreshing."  
  
"Psh. Whatever," Waston said.  
  
Officer Policeman seemed to be taking his time with his tea. Waston, impatient, was pacing around the picnic blanket, stopping frequently to kick the Officer in the shins, or to grab a cookie.  
  
Finally, the policeman was done eating. "We're off!" he cried. Then he shook his wooden leg and died.  
  
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Will Waston and Officer Policeman ever find the Graveyard? More importantly, will they ever realize what they're supposed to be doing and get to the bottom of this? Who exactly is this Stupid Fairy anyway? Find out all this and more on the next edition of "When Chickens Attack!" *theme song, "The Bum Bum Song", plays* See ya next time!!!  
  
::AUTHOR'S NOTE:: The last line of the story is something my mom says a lot. Whenever we're going somewhere, she'll say, "We're off, she cried, shook her wooden leg and died!" So, it kinda stuck. 


	4. The Amazing Chapter Title That Has Absol...

Welcome back friends! Or not friends! Or those nice people who have been sending me bomb threats! Hee hee, just kidding. Hey, does anybody eat those chocolate oranges? You know, the ones where you whack and unwrap? Just wondering...  
  
Hey, you know what time it is: IT'S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!!! He he... Just kidding.  
  
Disclaimer: The only things I own are Officer Policeman, Waston, and the Stupid Fairy. Everything else belongs to Nintendo and Shigeru Miyamoto *mutters* lucky little mshsm...  
  
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When Chickens Attack  
  
Chapter Four  
  
Aaah, yes, we're back with the next installment of "When Chickens Attack!" An epic tale of bravery, courage, valor, daring, and stupidity. Let's begin, shall we?  
  
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Officer Policeman had just finished his tea and was packing his junk up. When he had finished he put it back where it came from - nowhere.  
  
"Now, Waston," he said, "what do you suppose we should do next?"  
  
"Try going to the graveyard," he said monotonously (three point vocabulary word!).  
  
"Ah, yes, the graveyard!" cried the Officer. "Eh, but where exactly is the graveyard? We seem to be lost again."  
  
Waston rolled his eyes heavenward. "Why don't we try going to that big sign that says 'GRAVEYARD?'" he suggested in the same dull tone.  
  
"Brilliant deduction, Waston!" he said, and they galloped on imaginary white ponies to the graveyard.  
  
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"Hmm, what curious structures," said Officer Policeman, inspecting a grave.  
  
"Hey!" said a young boy wearing a wooden mask. "Don't cause trouble, or I'll tell Dampè!!!" They ignored him.  
  
"Now, I wonder where this fairy fountain is," pondered the Policeman.  
  
Suddenly, a Poe appeared in front of them. It cackled wildly and waved its lantern at the duo.  
  
"Hey," said the boy, looking at the Poe. "I wonder if any ghosts come out during the day? I've never seen one."  
  
The Poe ignored him. It hovered over to a grave, then waved its lantern again.  
  
"Now!" said the Officer in surprise. "Waston, what do you suppose this creature is trying to do?"  
  
The Poe waved its arms in the air and bounced up and down. Then it cackled again and spun into the ground.  
  
"NOW!" said Officer Policeman again. "Whatever does this thing want us to do? I just cannot figure it out."  
  
Waston gave him a sideways glance. "Try pushing it, genius."  
  
"Well, now! What a great idea!" Officer Policeman pushed with all his might against the headstone.  
  
"Hey!" said the young boy again. "Don't cause trouble, or I'll tell Dampè!!!"  
  
"Ah, shuddup," said Waston. He then ran over and kicked the boy in the shin.  
  
"OOOOWWW!!!!" said the boy. "MOMMYYYYYYYYY!!!" Then he ran off crying.  
  
Officer Policeman was still trying to push the stone out of the way, but to no avail. "Dammit!" he said. "Stupid stone!" Then he kicked it, which only resulted in a sore toe.  
  
"Get out of the way," said Waston, pushing the hopeless investigator away from the headstone. He then gave the rock a hard kick, and it crumbled into tiny pieces, leaving a large gaping hole.  
  
Officer Policeman stared at the hole, perplexed. "Now what do we do?"  
  
The Author came running in to the graveyard. "Lord save us," she said, patting Waston on the back and almost causing him to fall over. Then she ran out again.  
  
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NE-HEH!!! I didn't tell you who the Stupid Fairy was!!! I guess you'll just have to wait. Tune in next time for: When Chickens Attack - Chapter Five. *"The Bum Bum Song" plays again. Both the Author and the Narrator get up and start dancing.* See ya next time!!! 


	5. The Evil Hornets of Doom

Yo, sorry this is a bit delayed, but I was over at my friend's house. Ah... I can't think of anything cutesy to say. Sorry. And to Arwen: Who knows, I know, no, no, don't ask me, durf, nothing, and ?.  
  
You've already read the disclaimers for all the chapters; if you weren't smart enough to figure it out then... you're not very smart.  
  
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When Chickens Attack  
  
Chapter Five  
  
(The Narrator has lost her voice, and would like to request that we go ahead and skip ahead to the story. Thank you.)  
  
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The two men had just fallen down the hole to the fairy fountain. But it sure didn't look like the fairy fountain. There was just a treasure chest, a hornet's nest, and a hollow wall. Officer Policeman walked up to the treasure chest.  
  
"Could the fairy fountain be in here?" he wondered. He kicked the chest open. He raised his arms above him and said, "You've found a Gold Rupee! That's 200 Rupees!"  
  
Officer Policeman looked at the rupee. "That's not a fairy," he said, shaking his head. "Here, Waston, you can have it." He threw Waston the rupee.  
  
"Alright," he said, pocketing it, "so something is coming out of this trip."  
  
Officer Policeman then walked over to the hornet's nest. "Is this the fairy fountain?" He examined it.  
  
"Yo," Waston said, "use this." He threw the officer a slingshot that was conveniently laying on the floor.  
  
Officer Policeman looked at the slingshot coming towards his head, not really knowing what to do. When the slingshot hit his head, he looked extremely stunned.  
  
"Ow," he said. "I'm scarred for life."  
  
"That's why you're supposed to catch it," Waston said.  
  
"Oh," Officer Policeman said. Then, miraculously, he knew what to do (for once) and fired the slingshot at the nest. Unfortunately, there was no fairy fountain in there. But there were a whole bunch of angry hornets.  
  
"AAAAAAAAHHH!!!" Officer Policeman screamed as the hornets poured out of the nest. He jumped into Waston's arms, nearly squashing him. Waston threw him off, and he started running around frantically. He then began firing randomly at the hornets with the slingshot.  
  
"DIE EVIL BASTARDS!!!" he yelled, even though we aren't exactly sure he knew what a bastard was.  
  
Waston sighed. "Why do I always have to do all the work?" He then turned to the hornets and made an evil face at them and growled. Since they had no tails, the hornets ran off with their stingers between their legs.  
  
"Wow," said the officer, "I did it!"  
  
The only thing that kept Waston from jumping the daft policeman was the thought of the 200 rupees sitting in his pocket.  
  
"Well, now," said Officer Policeman, "what do we do now?"  
  
"Well," said Waston, "since the only things in this room are a chest, a nest, and a hollow wall, I'd suggest we try the hollow wall.  
  
"Wow," replied the officer, "I wish I was as smart as you, Waston. But one problem - what do we do with the hollow wall?"  
  
Waston shook his head. "Where would you be without me?" Then he kicked the hollow wall down.  
  
"Wow," repeated Officer Policeman, "I wish I was as smart as you."  
  
"You said that already, you idiot." And with that, it was his turn to grab the blue-garbed policeman by the collar. The two then ran into the big, gaping hole in the wall.  
  
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"Hey, dude," Officer Policeman said, "the music changed!" And indeed it had. The background music had abruptly changed from the creepy dungeon music to the harpy fairy fountain music.  
  
"Whatever," Waston said. He dropped the policeman on the floor upon arrival.  
  
"WOW!!!!" Officer Policeman yelled. "FAIRIES!!!!"  
  
He began to chase the fairies around. Dozens of them swirled around him until only one was left.  
  
"Play the song," it whispered.  
  
"Song?" the officer asked. "What song?"  
  
"The lullaby," it said. Then it swirled away.  
  
"What lullaby? I'm confoozled," said Officer Policeman.  
  
"Well," said Waston. "What's the only lullaby in the game?"  
  
"Uh..." he replied. "Brahms's Lullaby?"  
  
Waston smacked his head. "NO!"  
  
"But my mommy used to -"  
  
"I don't care!" Waston said. "The answer was false! You do not get 100 gil! You have 0 out of 1 - oops, sorry wrong game.  
  
"Anyways, the song is Zelda's Lullaby."  
  
"But I don't know how to play it..." Officer Policeman said.  
  
"Well then," Waston said, "let's look it up in the strategy guide!"  
  
So they searched through the book for about two minutes before finding it in the very back.  
  
"So," said Officer Policeman, "it's left up right left up right?"  
  
"Yup."  
  
"But what shall we play it with?"  
  
Waston thought for a moment. "Will these bagpipes work?"  
  
"Sure!" Officer Policeman grabbed the pipes and began playing.  
  
Suddenly, there was the sound indicating that you gad gotten something right, then they heard a familiar laugh.  
  
"Uh-oh..." Waston said.  
  
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Hmm, now, I wonder who that could be... Yes, find out next time! Oh, and why does Zelda get her own lullaby? Why don't I? What color are my socks going to be tomorrow? Those are things you will not find out. But you will still want to tune in next time for... *dun dun dun* WHEN CHICKENS ATTACK!!! See ya next time!!! *waves until she gets attacked by a bunch of Peahats* 


	6. The Great Fairy of Stupidity

Hello peoples! I'm sorry, I know I've been lazy!!! *sobs* What has it been now, three weeks? Yeesh. Anyway, I say screw disclaimers from now on... you people are smart (I hope) so there prolly isn't any need to...  
  
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When Chickens Attack  
  
Chapter Six  
  
(The Narrator has lost her voice again. Dumb announcer. Anyway, when we last left them, Officer Policeman had just played Zelda's Lullaby on Waston's bagpipes. Let's see what happens next:)  
  
"Uh-oh?" Officer Policeman said. "What's so uh-oh?"  
  
"You dolt!!!" Waston said. "Why don't you look?"  
  
"Oh." He looked. Lying there on the air (hey!!! That rhymes!!!) was a humongous fairy dressed in a white garbage bag with neon blue leaves painted on it with a paint pen.  
  
"Howdy!" she said in a nauseatingly cheery voice. "I'm the Great Fairy of Stupidity!"  
  
"Oh, God," Waston muttered.  
  
"Yuppers," said the fairy. "Now, I want you to go and do something for me."  
  
"Give me one good reason," Waston muttered under his breath. But Officer Policeman's reply drowned it out.  
  
"OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"Alright!!! I want you to return this fairy to its original owner. However, I have no clue who that is, so you're on your own for now. Questions?"  
  
Waston raised his hand. "Okay, Fairy-butt, why are you the Great Fairy of Stupidity?  
  
The Great Fairy smiled brightly. "Cause I feel like it, duh! And I thought I was stupid…"  
  
Waston sighed. "Let's get out of here."  
  
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"How are we gonna find this dumb fairy's owner?" asked Waston, as the fairy darted around his head.  
  
"HEY! LISTEN! MY NAME'S –"  
  
"I don't give a crap," Waston cut her off. "I'm gonna call you fairy-butt. Anyways, how are we gonna find Fairy-butt's owner?"  
  
Officer Policeman grinned. "I know," he said. "I'll become –"  
  
Suddenly a light shone from the officer's badge and nearly blinded everyone. When it was safe to look, everyone (Fairy- butt and Waston, that is) turned to see Officer Policeman dressed in a plaid tennis dress, which was EXTREMELY disturbing, and holding a staff with an indistinct lump on the top. He was –  
  
"Sailor Booger-Man!"  
  
Waston peered up at the insane Officer, disgusted. "I can see up your dress," he said.  
  
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Hey guys, sorry for the chapter being so short, I'm in a hurry! See y'all later! 


	7. The International Alliance for the Civil...

Yay! I updated again! Now you all shall be plunged into the depths of randomness!!! Please keep all hands, feet, internal organs, and other extraneous body parts inside the vehicle. Enjoy the show, or I will HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOU WITH MY EVIL WELL OF ROOT BEER!!!! 3.31.02 - Whew, I found this! It was lost on my hard drive… somewhere… and SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING! *cries* It's been kinda hectic, and teachers are PILING on projects… seventh grade sucks. Blech.  
  
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When Chickens Attack – Chapter Seven  
  
If you remember from last time (which you should, because you can just click the back button), Officer Policeman had just transformed into Sailor Booger-Man. Trippy, man.  
  
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Waston peered up at the insane Officer, disgusted. "I can see up your dress," he said.  
  
"That's okay, I've got on my spanky-pants!"  
  
"Oh. My. Goodness. Lord, save me now!"  
  
"They're pink."  
  
Waston gagged. Fairy-butt was running repeatedly into a grave. And that stupid little kid who was not there anymore was now there. Unfortunately, he was traumatized for life and had to run home to Mommy again.  
  
"Let's go!" cried the way too happy officer.  
  
"Fine," replied Waston. "As long as you change out of that stupid outfit."  
  
"Oh, fine," Officer Policeman said dejectedly, and sulked off to the nearest bathroom to go change back into his uniform.  
  
Waston, in the meantime, was exploring around the graveyard when a bright light fell from the sky. Waston, in a fit of panic, thought it was the Great Fairy of Stupidity, but in fact it turned out to be the Author.  
  
"Oh," said Waston. "It's you."  
  
"Well, is there something wrong with me?"  
  
"No." Waston paused, then decided to use this moment to his best advantage. "Look, could you PLEASE get me to be another person's sidekick?" he pleaded. "This Policeman character has been driving me up a wall."  
  
"Nope, sorry, no can do," the Author said. "I wrote in for a sidekick, and they sent you. They won't be too happy about sending another one." She patted the extremely put-out looking Waston and said, "But, if you behave, I can write you into your own little ficlet without the Offi-"  
  
"HI EVERYBODY!!!!" Officer Policeman yelled. The Author sighed. His socks were outside of his shoes and he was wearing one of his badges in his hair. "Hey, Miss Author! Haven't seen you in a while! D'you wanna see my-"  
  
"No," she said, cutting him off. "I have a meeting for the International Alliance for the Civil Rights of the Jeweled Hummingbirds of Djibouti that I must attend. Buh-bye." With a wave, she disappeared, leaving a very sour-looking Waston.  
  
"Stupid…" he said and ran off, leaving a thing behind. (Whee! That sentence made absolutely no sense!)  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
"So," said the Officer, "we're off to see the wizard, right?"  
  
The only thing that kept Waston from kicking Mr. Policeman in the shins was the thought of starring in his own fic. He kept his mouth shut.  
  
Fairy-butt, however, did not. "HEY!!! WE MUST FIND MY JERKIN-CLAD ASSISTANT!!! OR ELSE I WILL BE VERY SAD!!! WAA!!!"  
  
Just then, they heard the loud screech of a harassed chicken. Following the sound, they found none other than Link himself with a dead chicken impaled on his sword.  
  
"LINKY-CHAN!" said Fairy-butt, chasing after him.  
  
"AAAH!!!" Link yelled. He tried to run away, but he was being held back by the belt by Waston.  
  
"Why did you slaughter this poor innocent chicken?" Waston asked. "What did it ever do to you, huh punk?"  
  
"It attacked me!" Link said. "I was just wanderin' around, and it jumped out of the well and attacked me! It's rabid, I tell ya!"  
  
"Let the boy go, Waston," said Officer Policeman. "We must continue on our quest to- uh, what were we doing again?"  
  
"Actually, I dunno," Waston told him.  
  
"Alrighty then, we'll just wander around until you remember!"  
  
Waston shrugged. "Sounds good to me."  
  
So they wandered, leaving Fairy-butt buzzing around Link's head.  
  
"Just when I thought I had gotten rid of you…"  
  
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
  
Yay! I updated! *throws a party* Anyway, in other news, I added chapter names to all of the chapters, because they were nameless and in need of a name. Also, if any of you are reading my Red Rose fic, the next chapter should be up by today or tomorrow. And, uh… Happy Easter! *throws another party* Bye! 


	8. MMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOO

Oh my gosh, I haven't updated since Easter, have I?  *sweatdrop* I would have sooner but the STUPID servers were down… anyway.  Here.

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When we last left our heroes (or whatever the heck they are), they were confused.  Very confused.  And they still are now.

"Weren't we supposed to be finding out something?" asked Officer Policeman.

"Yes.  Duh.  Chickens were attacking and we needed to find out why.  Duh," Waston replied.

"But… you just said that you didn't know."

"No," said the short little dude, "and I'm always right.  So let's go find some clues."

So they did.

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They didn't find any clues.

"I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES, EVERYBODY'S NERVES, EVERYBODY'S NERVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Quit that," Waston said, thwapping him over the head with a dustbin that appeared out of nowhere.

"WOW!!" said the officer.  "A living, breathing dustbin!!! Can I have it? Please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please…" he stopped for a breath, then continued, "please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please?"

"No," said Waston.

Dustbin: *wheezes*

Random Kakarikan: Hey, look at the sudden change in dialogue formatting!

Author: *comes storming in* WHO DID THIS????!!!!

Skullkid: *cackles evilly*

Other Random Kakarikan: But you're not even in this game!  You're in the other one!

Skullkid: I don't care!  I'm cute, so I can do whatever I want! *cackles evilly some more*

Officer Policeman: I'm cute too!

Waston: …no.

Author: WELL?  ARE YOU TWO JUST GOING TO STAND THERE?!

Waston: Yes.

Author: No you're not.

Waston: Oh, okay then.

*a very nice chase scene ensues, dragging both through fire and water and throwing them up in the air, eventually ejecting them right back where they started*

O.P.: We got the script… *faints*

Waston: Idiot. *kicks him*

O.P.: *getting up* So, are you gonna change the story back?

Author: *looking at watch* Oh, look!  We're out of time!  And you aren't any closer to finding out… something!!! *points and laughs* Uh… what were you finding out again?

Waston: We're trying to-

Author: Oh, look at the time, gottagobye.

Waston and O.P.: *sweatdrop*

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Yeah, that was really stupid.  Oh well.


End file.
